The Help List


Everyone will ask you “What can I do to help?” have a specific list ready! You should not have any responsibilities (cooking, cleaning or otherwise) in your first few weeks postpartum. The only person relying on you is your baby. Your baby is your only priority. Use this list to help guide you and remember to be specific! 

  1. Ready to freeze and eat meals stored in a disposable container. Disposable container is key as you should not be responsible for cleaning dishes and returning tupperware! Be specific with the meals you want. Provide recipes (preferably from the book "The First Forty Days" and give instructions on what day and time you want to receive the meal. Websites like Take them a Meal exist for this purpose of scheduling meals. If there is someone who wants to help coordinate your meal train, delegate this management to them! 
  2. If your friend has more money than time they can sponsor a meal through MotherBees This is a great meal delivery service designed specifically for the nourishment of the new Mother. 
  3. Childcare. If you have older children this will be a big project. Coordinating care coverage for your older children is not optional. You cannot fully rest and heal while running after a toddler. If you don't have parents or friends who can help with this, Care.com or nannylane can help you find babysitters locally who have been vetted. 
  4. Grocery shopping! If family and friends can't do this, Walmart+ and instacart have made this very easy. 
  5. If a postpartum night doula is not in the budget you can ask a friend or family member to come over whenever the 'witching hour' is. For some it's 6pm and others it's 2am. A true friend would be disappointed if you needed help during this time and they weren't asked if they could help. 
  6. Laundry. If your significant other is busy with work and older children chances are this is piling up. Having someone come by once a week to do laundry and fold and sort it into piles that would make it easier for your significant other to put it back into their respective locations. 
  7. Dishes. If you have a friend who is willing to come over to help with this, awesome! Another fantastic option is switching to paper and plastic plates for a few weeks.

Heng Ou

Heng (pronounced Han) is founder of Motherbees, a national postpartum meal service and author of, "The Fist Forty Days The Essential Art of Nourishing a New Mother". Her book as been called the 'postpartum bible' and has been responsible for a cultural shift in the West inspiring women everywhere to invest in rest and prioritize their own care so they can be the best caregiver they can be for their baby.

Book you postpartum Meals Here!

Jen Darwin

Doula, L&D nurse, Mother, entrepreneur and now owner of the nation's first postpartum retreat center, The Village, Jen is working everyday to make postpartum care more accessible to Mothers everywhere.

Book your postpartum retreat Here!

Liz Hilton

Mother, inventor and entrepreneur, Liz Hilton invented the swaddelini after giving birth to her first son. While being a working Mom and experiencing postpartum emotional distress, Liz invented the swaddelini. Thanks to Heng's book, Liz was able to prepare for her final postpartum with her daughter and invest in the rest she needed to have the best recovery possible.

Get swaddelini in your hospital bag!